conflict

Chaos

Chaos

Every day the news or the Facebook feed shows some fresh angle on the craziness.  Devious legislative maneuvering, offshore money hoarding, oceans rising, earth eviscerating, and a full-house of presidential candidates duking it out while the Joker rewrites the rules, making himself a trump card in the game.  

I haven’t been around long enough to know whether the unique flavor of this craziness is stronger or more acidic than previous varieties, but it certainly feels unsettling.  

Listening is a Portal

Listening is a Portal

Have you ever noticed that when you focus your attention on any one sense completely, you become more present? Smelling the dank, minerly moisture in the woods in autumn. Fully experiencing the taste and feel of chocolate in your mouth. Focusing on the sounds of the frogs in a nearby pond. This is especially true with listening to others.

Attachment=Suffering

Attachment=Suffering

The first Noble Truth of Buddha is that life is suffering.

The second Noble Truth is that the origin of suffering is attachment.

When we are in conflict, we are attached to something, whether it’s money, a picture of our own future, a relationship that makes us feel whole, or being seen as right or good or smarter than the other person.  We are attached to an ideal future that we believe will bring us relief.  

 

The Most Important Consideration in a Separation

The Most Important Consideration in a Separation

So often in crisis we lose site of the forest while staring at the trees.  We forget what we’re doing it all for.  In the end, isn't some version of this photo what we all want?  We want positive relationships with the people in our lives.  We want respect and trust and friendliness.  We all want to get along.