One of the questions I most frequently get asked when clients are going through a separation is: 'How do I manage my money?'. It can actually by answered by breaking it into 3 simple steps 👉
As I wrapped up a particularly emotional mediation recently, I urged my clients to take good care of themselves and to make an effort to heal and restore in the subsequent weeks. This is more than an encouraging platitude at the end of a tough session. I often say this to people in the course of separation or intense co-parenting disputes because their circumstances are traumatic. Literally. Intense fighting, being left by the person you have built a trusting relationship with, losing daily contact with your children or financial and legal anxieties create trauma that gets stored in the body. And that can come back to haunt us individually and in our co-parenting relationship for years if we don’t address it.
I’m often surprised in mediations and in life how two people can recall a history or interpret facts so differently. Apparently neutral bits of information result in one person seeing a giraffe and the other seeing a tornado.
So often in crisis we lose site of the forest while staring at the trees. We forget what we’re doing it all for. In the end, isn't some version of this photo what we all want? We want positive relationships with the people in our lives. We want respect and trust and friendliness. We all want to get along.